Wodquartgovsis is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, proud penguin.

Wodquartgovsis created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wodquartgovsis, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wodquartgovsis, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Wodquartgovsis' most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Wodquartgovsis' Holy Commandments

1. Cats are not to be trusted.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Wodquartgovsis loves gulls, so they must be honoured.