Bidweeyatt is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, capable butterfly.

Bidweeyatt created dark energy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bidweeyatt, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Bidweeyatt, he will turn you into a sheep.

Bidweeyatt's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Bidweeyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never sit near dolphins.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never think about bacteria.