Mapcatnart is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, vain owl.

Mapcatnart created humanity four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mapcatnart, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Mapcatnart, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Mapcatnart's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Mapcatnart's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your legs brown.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in red.

4. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.

5. Mapcatnart must be the most important thing in your life.