Gutgumrut is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, slow spider.

Gutgumrut created the Virgo Supercluster three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gutgumrut, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Gutgumrut, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Gutgumrut's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Gutgumrut's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear turquoise corsets.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never go into indigo rooms.

5. Do not hurt hamsters.