Botbesskap is a god.

She takes the form of a small, unsympathetic hamster.

Botbesskap created matter eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Botbesskap, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Botbesskap, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Botbesskap's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Botbesskap's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick sheep.

2. Do not shave your head.

3. Rats are unholy and should not be approached.

4. You must pray to Botbesskap five times a day.

5. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Botbesskap in the centre of the settlement.