Nutquillqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, capable cat.

Nutquillqueeg created Africa four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nutquillqueeg, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nutquillqueeg, she will turn you into a hamster.

Nutquillqueeg's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Nutquillqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Put Nutquillqueeg first in all things.

2. Never look at nebulae.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.