Zanrappas is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, emotional mole.

Zanrappas created dark matter three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zanrappas, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Zanrappas, he will think nothing of it.

Zanrappas' most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Zanrappas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Zanrappas' name in vain.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Worship no other gods but Zanrappas.

4. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

5. You must pray to Zanrappas seven times a day.