Kopwadlapyarlnanmigbit is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, tiresome goose.

Kopwadlapyarlnanmigbit created life eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Kopwadlapyarlnanmigbit, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Kopwadlapyarlnanmigbit, he will turn you into a rock.

Kopwadlapyarlnanmigbit's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Kopwadlapyarlnanmigbit's Holy Commandments

1. Kopwadlapyarlnanmigbit loves voles, so they must be respected.

2. You must never eat figs.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

4. Always help sick monkeys.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.