Ratfotstik Quafbodsin Pibxucklog is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, impressive spider.

Ratfotstik Quafbodsin Pibxucklog created the world seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ratfotstik Quafbodsin Pibxucklog, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Ratfotstik Quafbodsin Pibxucklog, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Ratfotstik Quafbodsin Pibxucklog's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Ratfotstik Quafbodsin Pibxucklog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Run away if three manatees approach from the south.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never write about archaea.

5. Always wear magenta.