Cemtindobyat is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, loving porpoise.

Cemtindobyat created Asia three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cemtindobyat, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cemtindobyat, he will turn you into a dog.

Cemtindobyat's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Cemtindobyat's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Erect a large lead sculpture of Cemtindobyat on top of all buildings.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Cemtindobyat loves geese, so they must be respected.

5. Never talk about gravity near shrews while wearing fawn tights and balancing five aluminium spheres on your face.