Jadgembap is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, benevolent hare.

Jadgembap created dark matter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jadgembap, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Jadgembap, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Jadgembap's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Jadgembap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism near doves while wearing cyan shirts and balancing four platinum spheres on your legs.

2. Jadgembap must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Learn five new languages a year.

4. Jadgembap loves shrews, so they must be honoured.

5. Never think about galaxies.