Tailpidkar is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, emotional capybara.

Tailpidkar created the Milkyway eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailpidkar, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Tailpidkar, it will turn you into a worm.

Tailpidkar's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Tailpidkar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair pink.

2. Erect a giant titanium sculpture of Tailpidkar in the centre of the settlement.

3. Hide from white birds for they are unholy.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always wear mauve.