Fodkemkop is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, two-faced pig.

Fodkemkop created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fodkemkop, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fodkemkop, he will be very sad.

Fodkemkop's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Fodkemkop's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never think about gravity near pigs while wearing yellow coats and balancing four platinum spheres on your neck.

3. Never go into brown rooms.

4. Do not kill swans.

5. Do not hop in public.