Tonkvigwot is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, temperamental giraffe.

Tonkvigwot created the Sun nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tonkvigwot, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Tonkvigwot, she will be mildly annoyed.

Tonkvigwot's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Tonkvigwot's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Do not shave your feet.

3. Never think ill of sick swans.

4. Never wear violet ear rings.

5. Feed all hungry tortoises.