Fetdagab is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, unselfish snail.

Fetdagab created the world three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fetdagab, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Fetdagab, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Fetdagab's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Fetdagab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about eukaryotes.

2. Always wear orange.

3. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

5. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.