Japbamhun is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, grumpy ant.

Japbamhun created an up quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Japbamhun, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Japbamhun, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Japbamhun's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Japbamhun's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick ants.

2. Never sit in holy places.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not wear nickel on your body.

5. Never write about gravity.