Bonzodbug is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, merciful wombat.

Bonzodbug created matter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bonzodbug, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bonzodbug, it will turn you into a mouse.

Bonzodbug's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Bonzodbug's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about planets.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never talk about fluid mechanics near monkeys while wearing white tights and balancing five nickel spheres on your chest.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not cook food in pots.