Hitwigbast is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, merciful capybara.

Hitwigbast created everything that exists four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hitwigbast, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Hitwigbast, she will destroy your home planet.

Hitwigbast's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Hitwigbast's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat onions.

2. You must never eat aubergines.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not wear fawn clothing.

5. Never paint your back cyan.