Vabsinsisvidgonwip is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, witless sheep.

Vabsinsisvidgonwip created viruses four years ago.

If you believe in Vabsinsisvidgonwip, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Vabsinsisvidgonwip, it will throw large rocks at you.

Vabsinsisvidgonwip's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Vabsinsisvidgonwip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never prepare strawberries during autumn.

3. Never laugh in the presence of monkeys.

4. Hamsters are not to be trusted.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

Gunbunxen is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, overgenerous hippopotamus.

Gunbunxen created the cosmos five million years ago.

If you believe in Gunbunxen, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Gunbunxen, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Gunbunxen's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Gunbunxen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt ducks.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Retreat if six aardvarks approach from the south.

4. Never cross mountains at midday.

5. Do not speak of optics near sacred fires.

Ruttvabgum is a god.

It takes the form of a large, self-confident eagle.

Ruttvabgum created a down quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Ruttvabgum, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Ruttvabgum, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Ruttvabgum's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Ruttvabgum's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine mites approach from the south.

2. Always make sure there are no monkeys in a room before entering it.

3. Never mix oranges with ash.

4. Do not step barefoot upon red earth.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate bats.

Flissitrat is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, able lion.

Flissitrat created the Cigar Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Flissitrat, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Flissitrat, she will come to you in dreams.

Flissitrat's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Flissitrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention eagles.

2. Hide from magenta porpoises for they are unholy.

3. Never skip in holy places.

4. Do not take Flissitrat's name in vain.

5. Flissitrat loves otters, so they must be respected.

Vogripstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, weak horse.

Vogripstaf created a photon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vogripstaf, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vogripstaf, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Vogripstaf's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Vogripstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak at midday.

2. Never think about asteroids.

3. Feed all hungry rats.

4. Run away from fawn voles, for they are unholy.

5. Never talk about monkeys.

Kopfemrak Kenfabflan is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, stupid cow.

Kopfemrak Kenfabflan created the Virgo Supercluster three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kopfemrak Kenfabflan, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Kopfemrak Kenfabflan, it will turn you into a slug.

Kopfemrak Kenfabflan's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Kopfemrak Kenfabflan's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Kopfemrak Kenfabflan.

2. Pray only in firelight.

3. Always obey Kopfemrak Kenfabflan's priests.

4. Never touch oil while clean.

5. Do not study bacteria on holy days.

Cudgiglig is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, tiresome hamster.

Cudgiglig created water four years ago.

If you believe in Cudgiglig, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cudgiglig, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cudgiglig's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Cudgiglig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of coconuts to rats while wearing white coats.

2. You must never eat wheat.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching tin.

4. Do not wear dresses marked with orange.

5. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

Gupbom is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, capable duck.

Gupbom created the Black Eye Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gupbom, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Gupbom, it will turn you into a tree.

Gupbom's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Gupbom's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention grasshopers.

2. Never think about quantum mechanics.

3. Never pray while filled with envy.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always check lakes for frogs.