Nilraksafdonhapbastfot is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, stupid guinea pig.

Nilraksafdonhapbastfot created bats five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilraksafdonhapbastfot, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nilraksafdonhapbastfot, she will torture you forever.

Nilraksafdonhapbastfot's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Nilraksafdonhapbastfot's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never fashion tools from ash.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

Gamrilbast is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, effective jackal.

Gamrilbast created the Milkyway two million years ago.

If you believe in Gamrilbast, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gamrilbast, he will turn you into a rock.

Gamrilbast's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Gamrilbast's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear mauve.

2. Do not resist fate.

3. Do not eat cucumbers.

4. Never speak the names of planets aloud.

5. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Gamrilbast in the centre of the settlement.

Konkopflis is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, awe-inspiring goat.

Konkopflis created the Sombrero Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Konkopflis, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Konkopflis, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Konkopflis' most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Konkopflis' Holy Commandments

1. Always wash your arms before prayer.

2. Always maintain obedience during fasting days.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not skip at rivers.

5. Never eat aubergines.

Larpmegloop is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, self-confident snake.

Larpmegloop created vertebrates five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Larpmegloop, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Larpmegloop, she will send minions to preach to you.

Larpmegloop's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Larpmegloop's Holy Commandments

1. Always act with purity when addressing priests.

2. Larpmegloop loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not sprint at rivers.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not prepare wheat while wearing corsets.

Dussbelldam is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, loving naga.

Dussbelldam created dark matter five million years ago.

If you believe in Dussbelldam, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Dussbelldam, he will strike you with lightening.

Dussbelldam's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Dussbelldam's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Always remove jumpers before touching aluminium.

3. Never sit in the presence of elders.

4. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

5. Never speak at midnight.

Latraprill is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, uncaring human.

Latraprill created life three million years ago.

If you believe in Latraprill, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Latraprill, she will cry a lot.

Latraprill's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Latraprill's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove ear rings before entering holy places.

2. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate aardvarks.

4. Do not trade with those who eat rice.

5. Do not prepare aubergines while filled with envy.

Dutrakhotminpin is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, uncaring spider.

Dutrakhotminpin created light five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dutrakhotminpin, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dutrakhotminpin, he will make you grow a tail.

Dutrakhotminpin's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Dutrakhotminpin's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to five before sleeping.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not record signs concerning moons.

4. Never allow aardvarks to witness sacred rites.

5. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

Vablapnak Rillcapdimbuddudnulpak is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, charitable jellyfish.

Vablapnak Rillcapdimbuddudnulpak created silver three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vablapnak Rillcapdimbuddudnulpak, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Vablapnak Rillcapdimbuddudnulpak, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Vablapnak Rillcapdimbuddudnulpak's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Vablapnak Rillcapdimbuddudnulpak's Holy Commandments

1. Vablapnak Rillcapdimbuddudnulpak loves birds, so they must be respected.

2. Never feed lots of melons to swans while wearing gray shirts.

3. Do not wear indigo clothing.

4. Never prepare gooseberries during autumn.

5. Never travel toward the west during winter.