Muttailhun is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, able crane.

Muttailhun created the Virgo Supercluster three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Muttailhun, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Muttailhun, she will send you a sign.

Muttailhun's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Muttailhun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

2. Never write about amino acids.

3. You must love Muttailhun.

4. Always make sure there are no eagles in a room before entering it.

5. Never record signs.

Sabtitsinzenyok is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, duplicitous ferret.

Sabtitsinzenyok created the Sunflower Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Sabtitsinzenyok, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Sabtitsinzenyok, she will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Sabtitsinzenyok's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Sabtitsinzenyok's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never speak aloud of signs.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.

5. Hide if three otters approach from the east.

Gubfossrot is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, caring gnu.

Gubfossrot created a charm quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Gubfossrot, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gubfossrot, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Gubfossrot's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Gubfossrot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chant at crossroads.

2. Always keep your back turned to the west at sunset.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Never gather seven eagles near wells.

5. Do not fashion tools from lead.

Yarttonkbum is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, idiotic bird.

Yarttonkbum created snails five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarttonkbum, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yarttonkbum, it will curse you with boils.

Yarttonkbum's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Yarttonkbum's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear plain hats during rituals.

2. Feed all hungry badgers.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching nickel.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never record names.

Hunvigfit is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, benevolent chinchilla.

Hunvigfit created humankind four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hunvigfit, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Hunvigfit, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Hunvigfit's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Hunvigfit's Holy Commandments

1. Pray only in shadows.

2. Retreat if six porpoises approach from the west.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Never hurt birds.

Monstikhastig is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, almighty deer.

Monstikhastig created carbon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Monstikhastig, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Monstikhastig, it will turn you into a worm.

Monstikhastig's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Monstikhastig's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always cleanse water with water.

3. Never think ill of sick dolphins.

4. Never feed corn to hamsters while wearing ear rings.

5. Always look after injured manatees.

Mifteencep Besshimnad is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, prudent otter.

Mifteencep Besshimnad created dark matter four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mifteencep Besshimnad, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Mifteencep Besshimnad, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Mifteencep Besshimnad's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Mifteencep Besshimnad's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick dogs.

2. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Mifteencep Besshimnad loves geese, so they must be respected.

5. Do not fashion tools from tin.

Fligdossnill is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, capable goblin.

Fligdossnill created an atom nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fligdossnill, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fligdossnill, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Fligdossnill's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Fligdossnill's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Do not speak about garlic.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

5. Never paint your back magenta.