Panhingadpon is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, narcissistic warg.

Panhingadpon created the Cigar Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Panhingadpon, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Panhingadpon, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Panhingadpon's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Panhingadpon's Holy Commandments

1. Never whisper while facing north.

2. Never pray while filled with fear.

3. Never think about optics near grasshopers while wearing blue tights and balancing eight silver spheres on your neck.

4. Erect five iron sculptures of Panhingadpon on top of important buildings.

5. Never cross mountains at dusk.

Kemlapquart is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, ruthless swan.

Kemlapquart created Africa seven million years ago.

If you believe in Kemlapquart, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Kemlapquart, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Kemlapquart's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Kemlapquart's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick ants.

2. Pray only in darkness.

3. Always help otters in need.

4. Never mix bread with ash.

5. Do not eat tomatoes.

Kikquillmip is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, smart hedgehog.

Kikquillmip created carbon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kikquillmip, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kikquillmip, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Kikquillmip's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Kikquillmip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair yellow.

2. Do not count beyond three during ceremonies.

3. Never feed lots of beans to eagles while wearing violet boots.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

Jongilnell is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, effective jackal.

Jongilnell created a Higgs boson eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jongilnell, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jongilnell, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Jongilnell's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Jongilnell's Holy Commandments

1. Put Jongilnell first in all things.

2. Do not count beyond three during ceremonies.

3. Never stain your arms with yellow.

4. Do not speak about rice.

5. Do not drink alcohol.

Mobgubquag is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, kind dog.

Mobgubquag created Africa three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mobgubquag, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Mobgubquag, he will make you grow a tail.

Mobgubquag's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Mobgubquag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Erect seven copper sculptures of Mobgubquag on top of important buildings.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Do not chant in public.

5. Run away if eight dolphins approach from the north.

Bimkapwon is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, impressive hedgehog.

Bimkapwon created the Sunflower Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bimkapwon, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bimkapwon, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Bimkapwon's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Bimkapwon's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not place tomatoes upon stone.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. You must love Bimkapwon.

Flignartgepjin is a god.

She takes the form of a large, unthoughtful crocodile.

Flignartgepjin created oxygen two million years ago.

If you believe in Flignartgepjin, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Flignartgepjin, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Flignartgepjin's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Flignartgepjin's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Always remove ear rings before touching silver.

3. Never think about nebulae.

4. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Do not sit in public.

Dindidfut is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, merciless warg.

Dindidfut created the Virgo Supercluster four billion years ago.

If you believe in Dindidfut, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dindidfut, she will come to you in dreams.

Dindidfut's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Dindidfut's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Dindidfut.

2. Dindidfut loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not contemplate special relativity during the night.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not covet oxen.