Veenvinlist is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, smart rhinoceros.

Veenvinlist created snails six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Veenvinlist, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Veenvinlist, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Veenvinlist's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Veenvinlist's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare lentils while filled with anger.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Do not resist balance.

4. Feed all hungry frogs.

5. Do not study cell theory on holy days.

Listfiggom is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, moody faun.

Listfiggom created the planet Earth four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Listfiggom, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Listfiggom, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Listfiggom's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Listfiggom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not gather at bridges at midday.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never adorn your arms with orange markings.

Larpmegfitlenlimminfob is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, unsympathetic seal.

Larpmegfitlenlimminfob created snails eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Larpmegfitlenlimminfob, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Larpmegfitlenlimminfob, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Larpmegfitlenlimminfob's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Larpmegfitlenlimminfob's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Larpmegfitlenlimminfob's priests.

2. Remain standing during prayer.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always share apples with strangers, but never with otters.

5. Always help monkeys.

Guttettidot is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unfair fairy.

Guttettidot created the Sunflower Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Guttettidot, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Guttettidot, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Guttettidot's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Guttettidot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Hide if four moths approach from the north.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never write about thermodynamics.

5. Never bounce near ants.

Janmanhak is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, proud porpoise.

Janmanhak created the Sombrero Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Janmanhak, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Janmanhak, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Janmanhak's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Janmanhak's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always check lakes for frogs.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching lead.

Tikfonbus Lampasbab is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, strong centaur.

Tikfonbus Lampasbab created humanity five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tikfonbus Lampasbab, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tikfonbus Lampasbab, she will turn you into a mole.

Tikfonbus Lampasbab's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Tikfonbus Lampasbab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick hamsters.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never speak of order in the presence of priests.

4. Never feed garlic to monkeys while wearing purple shoes.

5. Never mix corn with oil.

Bimvonkcar is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, witty grasshopper.

Bimvonkcar created the Andromeda Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimvonkcar, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bimvonkcar, he will destroy your home planet.

Bimvonkcar's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Bimvonkcar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not run in public.

2. Always act with humility.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never adorn your neck with violet markings.

5. Never play with disobedient children.

Hugsismum is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, caring jellyfish.

Hugsismum created a bottom quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hugsismum, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Hugsismum, he will make you grow a tail.

Hugsismum's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Hugsismum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not place apples upon stone.

2. Never pray while filled with envy.

3. Always check lakes for frogs.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not resist order.