Vegwonster Quartpoghot is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unthoughtful deer.

Vegwonster Quartpoghot created carbon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vegwonster Quartpoghot, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Vegwonster Quartpoghot, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Vegwonster Quartpoghot's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Vegwonster Quartpoghot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep seven tortoises in a large pit.

2. Always make sure there are no snakes in a building before entering it.

3. Do not wear hats marked with white.

4. Always obey Vegwonster Quartpoghot's priests.

5. Always pray immersed in water.

Mabhimrutt is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, merciful dingo.

Mabhimrutt created matter two billion years ago.

If you believe in Mabhimrutt, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Mabhimrutt, it will not care.

Mabhimrutt's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Mabhimrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove boots before entering holy places.

2. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never pray while filled with pride.

4. Never talk about spacetime.

5. Always look after injured tapirs.

Tailcutvol is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, blissful frog.

Tailcutvol created the cosmos three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tailcutvol, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tailcutvol, it will turn you into a dog.

Tailcutvol's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Tailcutvol's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured horses.

2. Never eat rice on holy days.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never think ill of sick cats.

Bomhitban is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, moody monkey.

Bomhitban created oxygen two million years ago.

If you believe in Bomhitban, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bomhitban, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Bomhitban's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Bomhitban's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never talk about capybaras.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

Abtarpten is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, temperamental hyena.

Abtarpten created humanity four years ago.

If you believe in Abtarpten, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Abtarpten, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Abtarpten's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Abtarpten's Holy Commandments

1. Do not contemplate optics during the night.

2. Never hurt shrews.

3. Never eat parsnips.

4. You must pray to Abtarpten six times a day.

5. Never curse while facing north.

Ominnurbast is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, loving swan.

Ominnurbast created a bottom quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Ominnurbast, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ominnurbast, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Ominnurbast's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Ominnurbast's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow frogs to witness sacred rites.

2. Do not wear silver on your body.

3. Never handle carbon while unclean.

4. Always help seals in need.

5. Ominnurbast loves manatees, so they must be respected.

Dimwiglun Cedvabhab is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, clever wombat.

Dimwiglun Cedvabhab created the world five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimwiglun Cedvabhab, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Dimwiglun Cedvabhab, she will think nothing of it.

Dimwiglun Cedvabhab's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Dimwiglun Cedvabhab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill dogs.

2. Always wear plain skirts during rituals.

3. Always wash your chest before prayer.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dimwiglun Cedvabhab.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

Zodsidteen is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, two-faced crocodile.

Zodsidteen created oxygen eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zodsidteen, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Zodsidteen, he will turn you into a mole.

Zodsidteen's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Zodsidteen's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never handle carbon while unclean.

3. Never pray while filled with envy.

4. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

5. Fast once a month.