Fedwithonflis is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, quiet lobster.

Fedwithonflis created time and space nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fedwithonflis, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Fedwithonflis, he will try to impress you with trees.

Fedwithonflis' most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Fedwithonflis' Holy Commandments

1. Never touch ash while clean.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Never point your face toward the west during prayer.

5. Never mention capybaras.

Mabgebsinquaghakkad is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, clever weasel.

Mabgebsinquaghakkad created the planet Earth five million years ago.

If you believe in Mabgebsinquaghakkad, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Mabgebsinquaghakkad, she will turn you into a dog.

Mabgebsinquaghakkad's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Mabgebsinquaghakkad's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum mechanics.

2. Never carve symbols of nebulae into wood.

3. Do not shave your feet.

4. Never leap in winter.

5. Do not listen to music.

Quimdutyog is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, confident swallow.

Quimdutyog created vertebrates seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quimdutyog, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Quimdutyog, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Quimdutyog's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Quimdutyog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion tools from silver.

2. Never wear red dresses on sacred days.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not prepare melons while wearing corsets.

Cisszogcen is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, charitable porpoise.

Cisszogcen created the Milkyway nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cisszogcen, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Cisszogcen, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Cisszogcen's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Cisszogcen's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never gather four swans in one place.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never gather seven snails near walls.

Pagladlit Wabfoddun is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, omnipotent ant.

Pagladlit Wabfoddun created the Sunflower Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pagladlit Wabfoddun, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Pagladlit Wabfoddun, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Pagladlit Wabfoddun's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Pagladlit Wabfoddun's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine doves near doors.

2. Always remove coats before touching gold.

3. Never point your chest toward the west during prayer.

4. Always look after injured geese.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

Jopcudfeb is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, awe-inspiring narwhal.

Jopcudfeb created a strange quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Jopcudfeb, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Jopcudfeb, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Jopcudfeb's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Jopcudfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Always help swans in need.

2. Never stain your head with turquoise.

3. Never approach rivers carrying bone.

4. Do not wear black clothing.

5. Do not keep three bats in a large pit.

Tikdapdin is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish alligator.

Tikdapdin created a down quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tikdapdin, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tikdapdin, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Tikdapdin's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Tikdapdin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not step barefoot upon gray earth.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Tikdapdin loves turtles, so they must be honoured.

4. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

Flabbamgof is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, annoying hyena.

Flabbamgof created dark energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabbamgof, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flabbamgof, she will cry a lot.

Flabbamgof's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Flabbamgof's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never gather four otters near doors.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never sing in holy places.