Budsaszen is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, amazing giraffe.

Budsaszen created matter four years ago.

If you believe in Budsaszen, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Budsaszen, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Budsaszen's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Budsaszen's Holy Commandments

1. Erect four silver sculptures of Budsaszen on top of important buildings.

2. Always remove skirts before touching iron.

3. Never gather seven manatees in one place.

4. Do not wear red clothing.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Budsaszen.

Hannibnel is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, astonishing dingo.

Hannibnel created parasitic wasps seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hannibnel, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Hannibnel, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Hannibnel's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Hannibnel's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in turquoise rooms.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never talk about spacetime.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hannibnel.

5. Always cleanse water with water.

Vegbunzig is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, cheerful chinchilla.

Vegbunzig created Mount Everest eight million years ago.

If you believe in Vegbunzig, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Vegbunzig, he will destroy your favourite star.

Vegbunzig's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Vegbunzig's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention turtles.

2. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

3. Always check lakes for frogs.

4. Learn five new languages a year.

5. Do not stand on grass.

Sinjamkom is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, capable raccoon.

Sinjamkom created the solar system four million years ago.

If you believe in Sinjamkom, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sinjamkom, she will turn you into a slug.

Sinjamkom's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Sinjamkom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics.

2. Never skip in the presence of gulls.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not dye your hair yellow.

5. Never approach rivers carrying wood.

Fidtofafbus is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, idiotic squirrel.

Fidtofafbus created the solar system eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Fidtofafbus, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fidtofafbus, it will strike you with lightening.

Fidtofafbus' most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Fidtofafbus' Holy Commandments

1. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

2. Always make sure there are no dogs in a room before entering it.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Fidtofafbus on top of all buildings.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Never proclaim while facing north.

Gensafortsadjapgovyartkan Banlop is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, able cat.

Gensafortsadjapgovyartkan Banlop created the solar system four years ago.

If you believe in Gensafortsadjapgovyartkan Banlop, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gensafortsadjapgovyartkan Banlop, she will not care at all.

Gensafortsadjapgovyartkan Banlop's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Gensafortsadjapgovyartkan Banlop's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of names.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never paint your face mauve.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not resist order.

Vagbassbug is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, passionate dryad.

Vagbassbug created an electron six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vagbassbug, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Vagbassbug, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Vagbassbug's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Vagbassbug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not name children after turtles.

2. Heed all visions.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never talk about nucleic acids.

5. Never think about fluid mechanics near ducks while wearing magenta corsets and balancing six gold spheres on your chest.

Basstabhot is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, thoughtless capybara.

Basstabhot created oxygen nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Basstabhot, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Basstabhot, he will turn you into a hamster.

Basstabhot's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Basstabhot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Basstabhot.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Never write about quantum gravity.

5. Do not chop down trees.