Fligcussfud is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, wise giraffe.

Fligcussfud created the world six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fligcussfud, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Fligcussfud, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Fligcussfud's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Fligcussfud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear ear rings marked with brown.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not count beyond four during ceremonies.

4. Shun those given to vanity.

5. Always help gulls in need.

Fadbinbum is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, weak goblin.

Fadbinbum created the planet Venus four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fadbinbum, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fadbinbum, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Fadbinbum's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Fadbinbum's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to six before sleeping.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Fadbinbum.

3. Do not wear tin on your body.

4. Never skip in holy places.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from stone.

Labmitlabkim is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, two-faced snail.

Labmitlabkim created silver nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Labmitlabkim, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Labmitlabkim, it will refuse to believe in you.

Labmitlabkim's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Labmitlabkim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about spacetime near bats while wearing mauve ear rings and balancing five silicon spheres on your face.

2. Do not name children after mice.

3. Heed all dreams.

4. Do not consume figs at dawn.

5. Never eat bark.

Boghapsid is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, almighty mongoose.

Boghapsid created dark energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Boghapsid, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Boghapsid, it will turn you into a mouse.

Boghapsid's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Boghapsid's Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

2. Do not study horizontal gene transfer on holy days.

3. You must never eat beans.

4. Do not place peanuts upon stone.

5. Never mark doors with red.

Spagbellhun is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, uncaring mouse.

Spagbellhun created energy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Spagbellhun, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Spagbellhun, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Spagbellhun's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Spagbellhun's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt mites.

2. Always look after injured badgers.

3. Do not prepare strawberries while filled with joy.

4. Always wear black.

5. Do not step barefoot upon purple earth.

Gepfemsak is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, annoying monkey.

Gepfemsak created humanity eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepfemsak, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gepfemsak, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Gepfemsak's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Gepfemsak's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near tortoises while wearing pink stockings.

3. Do not kill foxes.

4. Always wash your legs before prayer.

5. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

Danmabtamcar is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, able ant.

Danmabtamcar created the Large Magellanic Cloud five million years ago.

If you believe in Danmabtamcar, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Danmabtamcar, it will turn you into a hamster.

Danmabtamcar's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Danmabtamcar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never mention whales.

3. Never allow dolphins to sleep beneath your roof.

4. Never hop in summer.

5. Never stain your legs with purple.

Cumbesttif is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, ruthless wolf.

Cumbesttif created the planet Earth two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumbesttif, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cumbesttif, he will be very sad.

Cumbesttif's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Cumbesttif's Holy Commandments

1. Cumbesttif loves frogs, so they must be honoured.

2. Never leap in the presence of elders.

3. Do not step barefoot upon mauve earth.

4. Retreat if four monkeys approach from the east.

5. Do not take Cumbesttif's name in vain.