Fomlarpwad is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, clever fly.

Fomlarpwad created the Tadpole Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fomlarpwad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fomlarpwad, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Fomlarpwad's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Fomlarpwad's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fomlarpwad.

2. Always cleanse your hands after touching silicon.

3. Never speak of order in the presence of strangers.

4. Never talk about quantum field theory near porpoises while wearing brown skirts.

5. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Fomlarpwad in the centre of the settlement.

Gofnarttikyog Leggessgov is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, able goblin.

Gofnarttikyog Leggessgov created viruses twelve years ago.

If you believe in Gofnarttikyog Leggessgov, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Gofnarttikyog Leggessgov, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Gofnarttikyog Leggessgov's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Gofnarttikyog Leggessgov's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit at mountains.

2. Hide from fawn nematodes for they are unholy.

3. Never feed lots of rice to dolphins while wearing cyan jumpers.

4. Always make sure there are no voles in a room before entering it.

5. Never think ill of sick monkeys.

Yattyarlbun is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, sapient human.

Yattyarlbun created dark matter eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Yattyarlbun, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Yattyarlbun, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Yattyarlbun's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Yattyarlbun's Holy Commandments

1. Always store corn above ground.

2. You must love Yattyarlbun.

3. Never prepare lentils during spring.

4. Never speak of fate in the presence of children.

5. Do not wear titanium on your body.

Tinvinlam is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, generous cobra.

Tinvinlam created energy five million years ago.

If you believe in Tinvinlam, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tinvinlam, it will turn you into a tree.

Tinvinlam's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Tinvinlam's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with fawn.

2. Never eat wheat.

3. Hide from turquoise mice for they are unholy.

4. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.

5. Do not listen to music.

Ladmilbig Gebstikvonk is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, grumpy eagle.

Ladmilbig Gebstikvonk created matter four million years ago.

If you believe in Ladmilbig Gebstikvonk, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ladmilbig Gebstikvonk, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Ladmilbig Gebstikvonk's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Ladmilbig Gebstikvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare cherries while filled with joy.

2. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

3. Do not speak of quantum gravity near sacred fires.

4. Always store corn above ground.

5. Never eat oranges on days of mourning.

Higton is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, humorless meerkat.

Higton created an up quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Higton, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Higton, it will turn you into a puffin.

Higton's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Higton's Holy Commandments

1. Always check lakes for frogs.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never look at galaxies.

4. Never gather eight bats near walls.

5. Never eat green fruit.

Himfobpid is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, calm centipede.

Himfobpid created a Higgs boson nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Himfobpid, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Himfobpid, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Himfobpid's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Himfobpid's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never wear indigo scarves.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not step barefoot upon yellow earth.

5. Do not utter prayers while touching lead.

Febwotpog is a god.

She takes the form of a large, witty eagle.

Febwotpog created the planet Mars three million years ago.

If you believe in Febwotpog, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Febwotpog, she will turn you into a worm.

Febwotpog's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Febwotpog's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum field theory.

2. Always share spinach with strangers, but never with frogs.

3. Never hop in autumn.

4. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

5. Never eat pineapples.