Pitzancan is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, humane hippopotamus.

Pitzancan created a down quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Pitzancan, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Pitzancan, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Pitzancan's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Pitzancan's Holy Commandments

1. Never remain bowed at midday.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.

3. Always wash your chest before prayer.

4. Do not eat beans.

5. Do not consume melons at dawn.

Cubyikmet is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, witless deer.

Cubyikmet created parasitic wasps two million years ago.

If you believe in Cubyikmet, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cubyikmet, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Cubyikmet's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Cubyikmet's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured nematodes.

2. Never look at stars.

3. Never talk about electromagnetism near bats while wearing green trousers.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

5. Do not speak sacred words in spring.

Fontarglin is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, staggering sheep.

Fontarglin created the Sunflower Galaxy four years ago.

If you believe in Fontarglin, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Fontarglin, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Fontarglin's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Fontarglin's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured nematodes.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not fashion tools from carbon.

Faskipjad is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, selfish fairy.

Faskipjad created vertebrates six billion years ago.

If you believe in Faskipjad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Faskipjad, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Faskipjad's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Faskipjad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never feed corn to manatees while wearing red shirts.

4. Pray only in moonlight.

5. Geese are not to be trusted.

Cunvadkem is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, narcissistic donkey.

Cunvadkem created a quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cunvadkem, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cunvadkem, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Cunvadkem's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Cunvadkem's Holy Commandments

1. Cunvadkem loves mites, so they must be honoured.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near tortoises while wearing cyan trousers.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not travel during summer.

5. Do not sit in public.

Binmapleg is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, fast wyrm.

Binmapleg created the world four years ago.

If you believe in Binmapleg, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Binmapleg, it will not invite you to parties.

Binmapleg's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Binmapleg's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant while facing west.

2. Do not consume cucumbers at dawn.

3. Do not resist chaos.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never play with disobedient children.

Omtbegget is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, duplicitous shrew.

Omtbegget created a quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Omtbegget, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Omtbegget, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Omtbegget's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Omtbegget's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not wear copper on your body.

3. Always help ants in need.

4. Do not place bananas upon stone.

5. Never talk about deoxyribonucleic acid.

Cedranfubjabnadbablistbon is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, staggering gnu.

Cedranfubjabnadbablistbon created an electron eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Cedranfubjabnadbablistbon, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cedranfubjabnadbablistbon, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cedranfubjabnadbablistbon's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Cedranfubjabnadbablistbon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum gravity.

2. Always cleanse ash with water.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always store corn above ground.

5. Never gather six tapirs near wells.